Why turning to sex work for a quick financial fix may leave you with long term problems. With real life case studies.

View story at Medium.com

Sex-addiction-and-the-brainAfter many years working as a therapist for pornographic actresses, I was devastated at the shock news concerning women being forced to turn to the sex industry for financial again after losing so many benefits through the introduction of Universal Credit.

If you are a university student, a mother with children to care for, or a single woman struggling to afford a basic standard of living, I urge you to seek help and guidance before turning to the sex industry. I have seen the physical and psychological effects of selling your body, and it is devastating.”

The sex industry is known as “the world’s oldest profession”. Yet unlike most professions, it remains virtually unregulated. And the consequences can be horrendous.

The results of a pilot study on the health problems of inner city sex workers published in The Journal of the Medical Library Association in 2003 identified a range of physical and psychological issues, such as rape, STIs, and depression. It found lack of regulation, including access to information and insurance were major barriers to health in the industry.

I have worked with the Adult film industry for over 20 years and witnessed widespread physical and mental abuse on many levels.

Take, for example, the case I worked on recently. I interviewed a young adult actress for my documentary, Porn Police. She says “I was unemployed and living on the streets in Bristol. I was approached by a Bristol based self-proclaimed pornographer and candidate as MP for the Bristol area ‘Johnny Rockhard’ who promised me a porn film career to make some money. But when I went to his house, I was just required to have sex with his friends, including anal, which I didn’t want but felt I had no choice”.

Whilst her story is shocking, it is far from unique. And the risks associated with the porn industry are not limited to our society’s most vulnerable such as the homeless.

Recently, Tory Minister, Esther McVey, raised the apparent increase in the number of women choosing to enter the sex industry to survive during the rollout of the Universal Credit scheme.

Whilst alarming, the increase is unsurprising as those who can’t afford to feed their families are turning to the sex industry in desperation. And this exposes a whole new range of people to the perils of an unregulated industry

Let me be absolutely clear – my position on sex work is not, and should not be construed as, a moral judgment on the rights or wrongs of the sex industry. It is based on the damage I have witnessed over many years counselling those within the industry and those seeking to transition out of it. I also work beside the Metropolitan Police Sexual Violence Unit and have seen first hand the harmful effects of crime within the sex industry.

I know from personal experience the damage caused by working in the sex industry far outweighs the short-term financial gain for women – sometimes as low as £50.

I have observed many times the physical and mental health consequences of that work including STIs, harm through violence from clients, pimps and unscrupulous “producers”, drug addiction and mental disorders. And these are only the short-term consequences of an unregulated industry.

A number of former adult film actors who I counsel share deep concerns about the long-term damage they and others have suffered both whilst working in the industry and since they retired.

Lucy was a top performer between 1998-2002. She says “performing in Adult films left me vulnerable to physical and emotional abuse and with a range of health issues. If you make a sex tape, when it gets out (and you should assume it will), it not only affects you, it affects your family, your friends, your relationships, your work prospects and the rest of your life”. She says “At the time, I thought it would solve all my problems and provide me with some financial security. But make no mistake, it cost me dearly, both physically and mentally. On occasion, I doubted whether I could survive the abuse I endured, and still endure 12 years later.  I know I will always be remembered as “that” girl”.

One of the UK’s top male performers who wishes to remain anonymous worked in Adult movies in the late 90s and told me “At the time I was married and working with my partner. We are now divorced. At the time I never thought about the long-term effects it would have on my family, it was all about the money; as a couple we were making £350 pounds a day. However I now regret it. My children have suffered abuse from neighbours, schoolmates and even strangers and I feel so guilty. It has ruined my life, my relationships, and I have had to have counselling to cope. One of the worst consequences of my decision to join the sex industry was that it forced me to turn on and off my emotions – it separated sex from love. It simply destroyed my life. And as a performer I was forced to sign away any rights to the sex tapes I made. Some of the work I did in 1999 was re-released under other titles as recently as 2012. There is nothing I can do about it. And I didn’t see a further penny”.

Kelly Berg is a retired performer who now works as a specialist counsellor to Adult models wishing to escape the industry and rebuild their lives. She says “Working in pornography certainly appears to offer immediate gratification in terms of money and so on. However, it doesn’t build self-esteem and the emotional damage it causes to performers far outweighs any financial gains. I see people who find it difficult to recover and have a healthy attitude to sex and relationships after. Some people will not survive after working in the industry. It does however provide some very dark times and has a ripple effects in their lifes”. She adds “Retired performers often refrain from speaking out against pornography because of fears it will threaten their new reputation, relationships and emotional well-being. Some experience symptoms similar to post-traumatic stress disorder”.

Clearly, sex workers have no protection against the harms of the sex industry, and this will continue to far outweigh the benefits until the industry is regulated.

My piece in The Sun online today-Unexpected ingenious uses for sex toys

Read my article today in The Sun

From hoover cleaners to door stops, you won’t believe what else this sexpert says you can do with sex toys – and why you’ll never look at a napkin ring the same way again


https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/7453422/alternative-sex-toy-uses/

Metro advice on how to support your partner and their weight issues

http://yaipoo.com/2018/09/23/widowers-note-to-woman-with-unappreciative-boyfriend-inspires-others/

What does your orgasm face say about you?

Orgasms have a way of showing what a female is really thinking..

What does yours say about you?

Read my article today in The Sun

https://www.thesun.co.uk/fabulous/7176284/orgasm-faces/

STORMY Daniels cost CBB by refusing to enter the house two hours before it goes live.

Stormy Daniels had arrived in the UK ready for her appearance on Celebrity Big Brother after long negotiations Welcomed on arrival by the wet, moist British weather, something similar to what she has experienced many times before on set I am sure.

“Hurricane Daniels” is the name I have given her after months of negotiations, ups, downs and change of mind more times than the world financial exchange rate.. pulled out 2 hours before the show was due to go live on UK television costing the channel an enormous amount of money.

I was asked in April of this year if I could contact “Stormy” and ask if she would consider appearing in this years CBB in August. Having worked beside the Adult industry for some 20 years I knew I could take this on, however I expressed my concerns from the start.

I knew it would not be easy especially with her having sucked Donald Trump in 2006 and becoming somewhat of a celebrity for it, however hard work is what I thrive on.

I’m also experienced well enough to know you can ask a top adult actress about business in the hope they will listen to you, if they don’t trust you then the door will be slammed in your face before negotiations can even start.

I work very closely with Stormy’s former friend Alana Evans who is a true professional of the industry, therfore I had no doubt stormy would undoubtedly be the same. After all who would break two legal contracts amongst such high publicity.

Unknown to me Stormy would.

A brief chat in May introducing myself to her I found her an easy women to chat with on the phone , she sounded intelligent and business like, 30 minutes later I am introducing TV agent and Stormy to start negotiations amongst themselves. I was delighted that I had tracked her down to one spot and her making time in her diary for a scheduled call with me.

The following months were not that easy, she changed her mind on the first offer of £750,000 (I use the word work loosely) for a maximum of 3.5 weeks work…. Reason being she has a book to release the end of August back in the USA.

It was eventually negotiated after lots of hard work that she would complete one week as a house guest for £200,000. Obviously it’s not as easy as just signing on a dotted line to seal the deal like others, it’s television and all kinds of paperwork and checks are involved. I know first hand this was a bloody nightmare to get her to complete and left the deal still not completed one week before the show, giving myself, the TV channel and the agent a near heart attack. . Then in true diva style she threats to pull out 12 hours before boarding a flight, throwing not only the show but everyone who has worked so damn hard on it into a meltdown, including me.

I’m lost for words on her behaviour…. I’ve never worked on a business deal like it.. Not even in the Adult industry. The last deal I remember being anything remotely near this bad was when I performed in Sex Survivor 2000 for playboy.

Fast forward to today, she arrives, does the PR video introduction for the show and all required photoshoot material ready for the launch at 9pm. I can now reveal she pulled out at 7 pm two hours before the show went live after suddenly loosing herself in a unbelievable tantrum for no reason, speculation is that it could be related to intoxication, medication, exhaustion or drugs–that can be the only explanation for her sudden change of character and abusive behaviour towards the CBB team. She was to be the star of the show–she was to be given the platform to take control and earn herself a new reputation and mainstream career. One has to ask why did she take the first class flight provided by Channel five in the first place? After five months of negotiations and giving people the run around what was her mission? If it was to prove she breaks more contracts and that her word cannot be trusted then she has concreted this in style. So much so that she has convinced top agents around the world never to want to work her.

People assume Adult stars can be high maintenance, this I don’t deny as some can, however it is only a small percentage as the rest are easy to deal with. Trust me, 20 years of experience I know.

I have flown back from the middle east for the show and to make her feel welcome, I have spent so much time on it and had many sleepless nights because of the Stormy Daniels media circus.

Is all my hard work done, no way as I have to pick up the pieces of many professional people’s trust and rebuild relationships with media that she has ruined. I will be passing on reports to industry leaders and magazines on both sides of the ocean, I hope everyone sees that even by risking the chance on her could cost them dearly.

I will not let her walk out the show and just walk away, she has no idea who she is dealing with when taking on someone like me. -after all I am British and proud of it. I spend a quantity of my time helping young women transition, trying to convince the media that adult models are not just a reflection of a lost soul and the Adult industry does have real business women. In my opinion the Adult industry made her, invested in her alongside my self and others and unfortunately now she is a women who can’t be trusted.

Being aware of unreleased details surrounding this case I will add to the blog in due course. Information has emerged which I feel is in the public interest.

The Katie price negative effect on young women

Screenshot 2018-08-05 at 09.11.22Katie Price has made a bizarre revelation she has intentions to make a sex tape only months after she posted a video online of herself appearing to educate teenage fans on explicit subjects in the street asking if they learnt more from her than their teachers.

https://www.thesun.co.uk/tvandshowbiz/6111241/katie-price-video-sex-talk-13-year-olds/

Recent rumours circulating that she has plans to make another sex tape has not surprised many-even after she was investigated for revenge porn earlier this year involving Alex Reid.

The reality if you make a sex tape and when it gets out (and you should assume it will), it not only affects you, it affects your family, your friends, your acquaintances and the rest of your life and Katie should not be advertising this to her young fans. Katie needs to wake up and realise the negative impact she is having on teenagers and young women.

Her loyal fans follow her every move and it’s natural for them to think that tomorrow is another day and everything they do today will be fine tomorrow-however this is far from true in Jordan Land. What they choose to do today will affect their tomorrow, and the day after that, and the one after that too – forever. Before they know it,they will be 30 or 40 years of age, and will still be living with the consequences of the choices they make today.

Not everyone has the ability to survive the abuse and insults making a sex tape will bring and no celebrity should promote it as a way to gain more popularity,  this is why I am so passionate that every young girl should understand the effects making a sex tape could have.

Katie has sunken to an all time low to try to keep herself recognised as the nations glamour girl by making porn without understanding the responsibility she holds to young women. She has bills to pay- is rumoured to be bankrupt, Peter Andre is rumoured to be helping her out financially- I think this is to save embarrassment for his own children.

Jason Maskell, a former glamour model agent who’s now a successful entrepreneur and CEO of adultXfunding.com, revealed how the tape didn’t even rake in a huge fortune at the time, earning Katie £50,000 at the height of her career.

He said: “Katie Price, aka Jordan, has done one sex tape already and got paid very well for it.

“But, to be totally honest, the day of the sex tapes has gone due to the amount of leaked content of naked celebrities, and I mean real ones, not the UK Z-listed names.

“They may make something, but not as much as in the past. I doubt it would be the same as the £50,000 she got for her original.

Screenshot 2018-08-05 at 09.17.39Unfortunately, for her loyal fans that copycat her every move they simply overlook the context of  her decisions and actions;. and follow her decisions and actions to try to stay in the media for fame.

The impact of making porn is far wider than this and should be taken seriously. It includes making a personal choice to make a sex film, owning it and living with it long-term. Unless you have complete ownership of that footage it will be on the internet forever making someone else money and will not pay your bills, not even in the short-term.

She has made many past critical errors in her career and responsibility to her fans, one was removing her breast inplants- promoting the fact to her loyal fans- then a short time later she had them put back in again. Young women put themselves at risk to copy her.

Her publicised revenge porn on Alex Reid, her public put down of Peter Andre,  her past spats with Dane Bowers to name a few. Yes, she has done some good but this gets over shadowed by her desperate attempt to stay in the spotlight.

Remember, choices you make today will have an impact on your future. I work with many former adult stars and sex workers who try to move on. They suffer low self-esteem, isolation and lack of community skills such as interview skills, resume issues, and how to handle their past to move forward.

Your decision to make a sex tape will always be remembered. You will always be remembered for it – as “that” girl. Do not copy Katie Price.

 

Lianne Young

Sex and relationship counsellor for House of Ardent

 

Could you cope a month in an Indian Yoga school?

Some weeks have passed since I posted an article on my Yoga Prison experience,if you never got to read it, here is the link https://lianneyoung.wordpress.com/2018/06/11/the-yoga-prison/

I can honestly tell you it was one of the hardest challenges I had ever set myself in many ways, for starters the food was all vegetarian (I love nandos), no coffee (I am a coffee lover) no sugar (I love chocolate), no washing machine (I am spoilt), no television (yes I am really spoilt)… these are just a few of the changes.

Week one– I managed to get through and adjusted to my new surroundings which was similar to prisons in fact our food trays were identical.

Adjusting to life with a dozen other women is a challenge, the last time I done this was when I appeared on a channel four reality show “When women rule the world”. This was different as there were no men I could run off to a bar with and play pool……yes I did escape from a reality show. The Yoga women are different with many here to change direction in life, pursue their dreams or like me to learn a new skill.

Week two- This was easier than the previous simply because we had routine and our surroundings had become normal to us and people were wanting to plough on and learn. The one day break they had given us as the end of week one really helped, a simple trip into the heart of Rishikesh was more than a delight as we got to drink coffee! Don’t get me wrong it was no stylish Italian roasted bean I desired, but it was coffee and it had caffeine! Rishikesh has no alcohol and no meat anywhere and if you are caught with alcohol it is a three-month jail sentence.

This weeks schedule changed from the previous as they added Yoga Philosophy with the Yogi master. Yogi and I did not always get on as I had come here to learn a new skill and not change my life and not only this I have gone down with Delhi Belly this week and really could not cope with his classes.

This week is a real challenge as the actual physical classes are harder and one teacher has taken leave due to a bereavement so we were juggled between teachers which really did not help as we were still beginners. What made it worse was Yogi instructed some of the physical classes -it sounds like I dislike him, honestly I dont…its just some people are natural teachers and some are not, he is not.

This week I got my roommate back which is great, we had both adjusted to our surroundings and calmer, I even become used to the bugs and therefore I was not continuing my world war three with the critters. In fact having her back in the room was rewarding in many ways as she is a very open and honest young lady, not addicted to electronics and understands life. We both decided to escape one day well knocking off the philosophy class to go and buy coca cola-my Delhi belly had left me dehydrated and I needed sugar.. the word soon spread that we found the local shop.

Week three– God help me now i am going to pull my damn hair out! I found out the Yogi is only 31 years old which makes him 13 years younger than I. My whole vision of a Yogi master before I came here was of an older man with a long beard, white hair and calming . This is so far from my Yogi- he’s 31 and bit of a hipster with long hair and very up and down with his mood swings and lets not even talk about his philosophy classes… ok we will.. I attended two and the man is off his rocker… he makes no sense what so ever as he keeps going off on his own personal stories, I had to give up going and learn from my text-book as I was completely lost listening to him. I can assure you I was not alone as 75% of the group decided to learn from the book rather than him.

Its a struggle this week as the pressure is on for the exam finals and we have been given no idea what to expect so we can’t revise. My stomach is better now thankfully, however eating the same food for breakfast, lunch and dinner started getting to me. Thankfully they surprised us one day with fried falafals and chips-they even chucked in some ketchup! I serious now know what ketchup is all about.

Already one women had departed after three days through a sinus infection and now one had a abyss on her face, I had suffered Delhi Belly and now an enema have been introduced!

Now I will be honest here and admit I have done many enema in my life due to my past career as a Porn star (many moons ago)… however there is no way I am going to do one in unsterile conditions or without betidine solution just like I will not put mud on my face which has given someone an infection, I poured salt water through my nose that was enough for me, the others actually pulled rods through theirs…I never done this as again it was not sterile.

The tempature is in the 40s and making us all struggle we need rain!

P.S I have now won all the bets of how long would last

Week four

This week was exam week and we had to teach a 45 minute class and then a 90 min class, I find the practical side easy as I am already qualified in fitness and have run classes, however I could see others were so I tried my best to help them. First I stole a clock form the main office so they can look at the time rather than their phones well running a class, I also lend people my master learning book which is a brand I use for all fitness routines-The Anatomy of fitness (Yoga) they cover all kinds of fitness and show actual muscles worked and benefits- it is a students dream. I have studied continuously in my life so have learnt what is good and bad along the way and belive in helping others.

I passed the 45 minute class which helped me feel confident of passing the 90 minute class.

The 90 minute exam was going to be supervised by the lead teacher so everything had to be near perfect, fortunately I am pleased to say I passed the practical exam with flying colours. Now it was revision for the theory, I had read all about the Chakras and Pranayamas and everything else we have had to learn along the way and it was near impossible to remember everything so I decided I just go with it- Yoga is meant to be relaxing not stressing.

The last day and night- How happy was I too see this day-whoever thinks a Yoga teacher training course is simple are wrong. The highs and the lows have all been worth it as I have passed all my exams including theory which means I am now a qualified Yoga teacher.

The last day another transition was setting in as we would all be going our separate ways tomorrow-mine was to run off to the golden sands of Malaysia for a well-earned rest.

The last evening was spent listening to a traditioanal Indian band which was a great experience. The following morning was the closing ceremony where we received our certificates and posed for the camera before leaving for our flights.

Considering an Indian Yoga school

Be prepared for hard work both physically and mentally and if taking a course in India don’t expect luxury. The heat is something else and not for people who dont like it, there are bugs everywhere and there is nothing you can do about it so take this on board.

You will meet others from all walks of life and not all you will get on with so go with the flow and brush it off and surround yourself with the ones that compliment you.

Dont think it’s a summer camp as it’s not. Its long days, continuous study and very early mornings.

Lianne Young

PS…I went in at 68kg and came out at 60kg! watch out for my next next article on how to loose 8kg in 4 weeks.